I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
