Dual....:-)
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize