she kept yelling 'call me bella'
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
