HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize