am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
P.S. I can't hear my feet
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
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