Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
