i always forget guys have bellybuttons
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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