remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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