Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
