***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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