Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize