he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
