Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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