I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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