Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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