Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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