hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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