Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
