I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
