A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
