i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
