I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
