About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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