Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
When did angry sex become our thing?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Randomize
