Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I have tasted many bathrooms
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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