have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
