Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
