You smell like stripper and shame
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
