i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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