So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
