Its about making memories worth repressing
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize