Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Randomize
