please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
