Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
