Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
