Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
She even gives head with a lisp.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
