you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
