Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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