Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
