One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize
