i may or may not be watching the land before time
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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