don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
