When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
you will always have a special place in my vag
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
you made out with another girl for some wings
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
