whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
