I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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