yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
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