Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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