i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
