Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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