at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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